its a beautiful morning
as i write im also looking out my west facing windows and see grandmother moon.
she is so beautiful and magnificent. gloriously beaming and shining with her soft glow.
warmly greeting me, i set my alarm to awake and see her shine.
i love this time of the month.
once a month she gets to see her lover, the sun. for a moment in time these ancient lovers have been meeting at these early morning times of the day for thousands of years.
i basque in their splendor.
lovingly recalling the first time i witnessed their love story.
twenty eight years later, i am still amazed. the royalty of their love is quiet, and yet also filled with sounds of mother earth and painted with colors of father sky.
i find myself telling her my secrets and deepest desires. as she cradles them, her beams stream down towards me to, as if to say, they are safe and with me now.
she holds dreams, tears, smiles, and love untold. lovingly, creating space for us to keep growing.
i have come to know that grandmother moon loves us tender.
i count the minutes to when she will leave and hide behind the horizon until tonight when she (re)emerges to bring all the shine reminding us to cleanse our crystals and make moon water.
as i stare up and see her loving glow, i adore the way she accepts every one of my flaws. perfectly imperfect, i am scarred. with broken pieces that were put back together with a golden seal of love, she loves me simple and also loves me deeply.
amazing how the simplest forms of (self) love can also shed light on how we see ourselves. i will never be as powerful or as beautiful as her, but once a month, she does make me (re)think that i am.
while during my moon time i have been emotional while confessing my love.
at times, i have also been drunk with anger.
in other moments, i have been soft, quiet, gentle, calm, and pure.
she makes me feel all these things and i love every emotion that has flowed through my veins. every droplet, every painful cramp, every zit, every headache, everybody ache, every bloated feeling i have ever had, she reminds me i am a woman full of life. a name my grandmother gifted me.
i miss my nahlii lady dearly somedays and other days, i know she is with me and walks with me daily. ive become my grandmother waking up early greeting ha’yoołh’khal.
i feel grown up, but dont when i say that because in my mind, my grandma was a sheroe. she made magic happen and i have never self actualized that i could be as great as she was.
as i begin my day i am allowing my heart to feel everything she does and to truly say im healing.
beauty emits healing and it glows with this early morning moonshine.
my healing is your healing.
our healing is healing others.
and when we heal, we also heal those who came before us and those yet to come who will follow in our footsteps.
healing is collective and happens when generational trauma is interrupted. the interruption looks, tastes, feels, sounds, and smells like healing.
so let us remember how grandmother moon glows and shines down on us tonight and tomorrow night.
let us remember how starshine, sunshine, and watershine can also help us glow with healing love.
like all the shine.